where thoughts materialise.

So we're into the sixth version of my blog after the last version hung around for a year or so.

Now, a bit of info on this image. This photo was taken one lovely spring afternoon, featuring the iconic Old Well from the UNC Chapel Hill campus. I would like to think of this image as a tribute to my time in UNC Chapel Hill, the awesome friends I made and the memories I now hold dear.

A milestone in my life indeed.

I've dropped the tagboard cos its useless and taking eons to load. But thanks to Angela who helped me set it up, I still do like and will miss the pink interface.

So yeah, it's the sixth one you fellas!

Yours.

27 April 2008

you know you miss my older entries

October 2004 November 2004 December 2004 January 2005 February 2005 March 2005 April 2005 May 2005 June 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 October 2005 November 2005 December 2005 January 2006 February 2006 March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008

Sunday, September 24, 2006

In lastest news, we surprised Shujun, fondly known as Mooncake, by throwing a very small and short but very sweet mooncake celebration at the ground floor of her condo. It was a spontaneous decision made my Vic and I, inspired by the mooncake fair at taka square, and it turned out really well.

* *

This is without a doubt one of the longest hiatus taken in recent months. Having lost someone so dear, I still find it hard to move on, completely that is. Life remains the same however, and I seem to get by almost without a scar. I still wala, sing along with Shirlyn. I still meet up with the usuals and do not get home until midnight. I still laugh the way I hysterically do.

But something deeper within has changed, forever. Beyond the fact that she has passed on, it is the memories that hold me captive. It seems as if I have to re-live life, cos all these memories do share a common factor of her existence in them. It's complicated and I shall not every attempt to explain that.

In anyway, life has been utterly good. Too many kind and loving people around me, each caring in their own simple way. And I can seriously not ask for more.

A new day has begun.

nimgnoy let the night fall at 3:48 PM

1 comments

Saturday, September 09, 2006

It is a time for renewal.

Like how the new 06/07 Ikea catalogue finds its way to every home, we can now discard the old catalogue which remains invalid now.

Accepting that my grandma's gone was and still is particularly tough, even though I had a good 20 months to prepare for it. I guess people just do not find it within our systems to prepare for something as obscure as death.

I know at least that she is in a better place now, in better hands, for God's hands never fail.

And we should move on.

I wonder if I can find it within my heart and mind to ever move on completely. She is, and even after passing on, still is my dearest and most loved. I wonder if there'll ever come a day I do not think of her or ever a moment I do not miss her.

Moving on is perhaps the hardest to do, for memories remain. Memories that once brought joy now bring tears. And we are left to grapple with these little pieces of time once known to us, that can never possibly be replicated again.

It seems almost illogical but sometimes in my solitude, I still cannot believe that she is already gone. It just seems too hard to be true that this is the moment I knew will inexorably arrive, and has inexorably arrived.

I'll always love and miss her. She is a very special woman to me, one that has the ability to hold five children and six grandchildren together in love and affection, even till the day she died.

Good bye for now Ah Nae, we'll meet on that beautiful shore in eternity one sweet day.

A new day has to begin.

* *

Taking this time to thank:
(in no particular order really)

Nev - for really everything. Doing all the behind the scenes stuff, running around to make sure I do not have to worry about the nitty gritty stuff in school and hostel and always being on standby 24/7 for me. And for coming to the wake twice.

Jon - for immediately wanting to come down on the first night. And for coming to the final service before the burial. Your presence was comforting and deeply appreciated.

Vic - for buying and having lunch with me. And that bag of goodies which kept me occupied (reading mags), full (the chocs), quenched (the snapples) and healthy (the apples). Very thoughtful, very bestfriendish.

SJ - for coordinating the group to come down the second night. And really being there always.

Yvonne - for the very comforting sms-es which really made me feel better in time of grief. And for coming down on the second night.

Jia Xin - for being with me every step of the way - every postcard, every prayer and every encouragement. And for coming down on the second night.

Jackie, Pei Wen, Pei Jun - for heading down the second night to give me that much needed support and affection.

Jun Han and Joseph - for heading down (and cabbing back and forth) after IHG stuff.

Esther and James - for dropping by the third night, a short yet reassuring visit.

Miss Lim, Ling Huey and Yifang - for heading down the fourth night. and to Ling Huey, the nice chocs. to yifang, you've seen me through too much, and i am glad you were willing to be there in my down times too.

Winston - for coming down the fourth night. I really didn't expect you to come but I am really touched by that gesture. Cos I wasn't there for you when your grandpa passed away, yet you chose to me with me now.

Jessica - for that sms from Melbourne.

Ruth - for that email. I cannot believe you have been quietly reading this. But I appreciate the effort always to keep in touch and giving me support and encouragement.

Ying Zhen - for helping me out with the obituary.

And to all others who sms-ed or helped.

It's at times like these when those who really matter come forth. And I thank you all.

nimgnoy let the night fall at 12:30 AM

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Sunday, September 03, 2006

nimgnoy let the night fall at 5:02 PM

1 comments